word association

so today during drama, we learned something new(ish)

and it's as the title says, word association.

so here is my take on word association.

love

i will not utter your name,

i shall not remember your face

i will not think of your smile

i will not think at all

because you are always on my mind

i try to think around it

never cleary thinking of you

because in my heart i dread

that feeling of falling

falling so deep in this infatuation

this feeling that makes me helpless

this feeling i can't control

so i avoid it

push it away

refuse to acknowledge it

outrightly deny it

because i cannot have this.

i cannot have me wanting you.

i don't want to want you.

because saying it aloud makes it so real

makes the feelings real

and i just can't deal

because this isn't love

i don't want to love

love isn't all bright and sappy

because love brings me pain too

i don't want to want you

i want to forget you

leave my mind

leave my thoughts

you aren't welcome here.